Why does God Hate Me?
Why does God hate me? Many people are asking this and I can understand. It’s hard to believe in God’s love in the shadow of a trying time. I used to hate God because of all the hurting and brokenness I saw in the world. But Jesus has taken me on a journey and led me to a different point of view. One of my upcoming books delves into this subject and I thought I’d share a portion of it.
The problem—We don’t know how much God cares.
The reason—We don’t see the true cause of the pain and suffering in the world, and we wonder how a God who is present and good could ever let it happen.
The solution—Ask God to show you His goodness and His love, and thank Him for it.
Is God to blame?
So many have the view that God causes bad things to happen, if only for their “ultimate good.” Well-meaning Bible-educated believers, who love God, can come to this conclusion. The Old Testament seems to indicate this in some places. But God wasn’t finished unfolding His plan of redemption, and Jesus had not come yet.
We need to be careful what we may unintentionally blame God for, and what the implications are of the things we attribute to Him. Christians often look at tragedy as if it’s from God and somehow a good thing beyond our understanding. When a loved one dies too young, a natural disaster happens, or someone receives a diagnosis of a so-called incurable disease, people say:
- God took them home.
- He must have needed them there more than He needed them here.
- God works in mysterious ways.
- He doesn’t give us more than we can take.
- He wouldn’t let this happen, unless you could handle it.
- God must be teaching us something.
- He did this to lead us back to Him.
- God disciplines the ones He loves.
There is an element of truth to some of this, because no matter what happens, somehow He does still work it out for good (Rom. 8:29). His goals will be accomplished. He does teach us, lead us, and discipline us. But He does this despite the fallen nature of our world. Just because He picks up the pieces of our lives and makes art, doesn’t mean He smashed them to begin with. Just because He knows the beginning from the end and works it all out, doesn’t mean we are all automatons.
Why does God hate me?
My wife and I have a friend who is hurting so much. She believes God took someone she deeply loved from her when the person got sick and died. She’s angry with God and hostile at the mention of Him. I feel so bad for God getting the blame, and our friend is suffering from the lies of the enemy. It’s choking the joy out of her life.
We all experience these kinds of wounds at some point. The trouble in the moment is remembering God’s character. Listen to what Jesus said about the difference between the enemy and Him, though. This is a clue about the source of our struggles.
Jesus said, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full”
– John 10:10 (NIV)
The Father’s Heart
Becoming a father has helped me get a glimpse of God’s love for me. I would give my children anything they wanted if I knew it was good for them. Not only the things I want them to have, or scarcely what they need. I don’t have to be interested in what they want. I’m happy to give them whatever they ask so long as it won’t hurt them now or in the future. And I would never make them sick or kill someone to teach them something. This is a ridiculously obvious statement, but for some reason we don’t put this kind of behavior past God.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.
“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets”
– Matthew 7:7-12 NIV
He really is better than you could ever hope, dream, or imagine. Jesus made this amazing statement that no one is good except for God alone. He basically redefined “good.” Think of this word. We call a lot of things good. The movie was good. I got a good night’s sleep. We had a good day. Our dog is a good boy when he obeys. But Jesus said,
“Only God is truly good”
– Mark 10:18 (NLT)
There is no bad in God. He is not like the mixture we have experienced, where we can call something good, despite its imperfections. Jesus loves perfectly. God’s grace, His generosity towards us is perfect. Our heavenly Father’s mercy, the undeserved pardon we receive, is perfect. His judgment, holiness, righteousness, and purity are perfect.
All these characteristics are seen coming together in the life, sacrifice, and resurrection of Jesus. Because God loved us so much, He humbled Himself and became like us in the form of a man. Jesus did this so He could live the perfect life we were supposed to. Then God gave that perfect life to us graciously, even though we had done nothing to deserve it.
Along with that, God carried out His righteous judgment for sin on Jesus, when He went to the cross. Showing God’s holiness, but also mercy toward us, because Jesus took the punishment we deserved for sin. Then Jesus conquered death, as the Holy Spirit raised Him to new life. This new life has been offered to us freely.
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved”
– John 3:16-17 (NIV)
What can you do?
1. Think about the negative things you are going through, and have gone through, and start to talk with God about them. Ask Him to show you what He wants to do in those situations. Invite Him to do what He wants to do.
2. Look for the good things that are in your life and even for the good that has come during, or out of, the bad things. Start to thank God for these positive things. Ask God to help you continue this habit of recognizing and thanking Him for the good. When trials come, remember God’s character and thank Him in advance for shifting things to positivity even while you are in pain.
3. Ask God if you have attributed any bad things to Him. Ask His forgiveness for blaming Him. He loves you and is patient and merciful towards you. He will help you to walk in His ways of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Gal. 5:22-23).
If you’re interested in reading the rest of this book, click here to get a free copy upon release. I hope you’re not asking, “Why does God hate me?” He loves you deeply. He wants to help you with whatever you’re going through.